it seems that the second week was even more chill than the first one. i almost didn’t have any low days and overall felt much happier than i had in a long time. the only thing that was quite weird—sometimes i felt e-x-t-r-e-m-e-l-y exhausted. like, for real. and even though i’m not a huge fan of coffee, there were days when i was drinking 3–4 cups. and it kind of helped.

on the other hand, i noticed that talking to people doesn’t take as much energy as it used to. and i kind of enjoy it again. i met some friends, i talked a lot, made jokes, told stories. and i really enjoyed the process. i mean, i don’t have huge social anxiety—at least i thought so—but now it is so much… easier?

it’s so interesting to notice changes. i really see them. i really do. and it’s so interesting, because i usually don’t see them in the moment, but a few seconds later i realize that something unusual happened, and i can’t help but be surprised by it.

even the sky looks different now. and the colors—they’re brighter. i feel like i see everything in HD again. kind of the same feeling i had when i first tried contact lenses or after i had LASIK surgery. it’s fascinating, and i try to enjoy every second of it.

and i’ve started to feel happier. i really do. it’s getting brighter, and my mood is getting better. everything is just acceptable the way it is. and i just say yes more and say no less. i feel less anxiety. my mind is getting clearer.

all the weird thoughts in my mind have calmed down, and i’ve calmed down with them. like wearing noise-canceling headphones. the noise is canceled. here i am, and here are my thoughts. clear as ever.

in the end, i want to mention that now i’m starting to feel the buffer—the space between myself and my thoughts and my actions. and i can actually think better. so it seems the meds are working, and i do hope that soon i will start something awesome. can’t wait.